It's very easy to have complete faith that God is working amazing things in your life; that He has a plan; that we are loved by Him...when things are going well in life, anyway. I've always been challenged with maintaining that level of faith when things are not going so well. This week alone, my 22 year old daughter has lashed out at me (not in a small way, either), my nephew has been hospitalized once again, my mother has been hospitalized,there was completely unforeseen financial stress, and I've been left wondering if I should bother to get out of bed. I quite literally fought the urge to return to the comfort of that bed about an hour after I awoke this morning. Yep, I feel tired and I don't know if it's physical or mental at this point.
I know God, in His infinite wisdom, works all things for good. I KNOW this...but I'll admit that when push comes to shove in my life I have to wonder how any good can come from the bad events. It's a lack of maturity in my faith ~ must be. I'm relatively new at letting Him control the outcome of things. Until a few years ago, I liked to think I had complete control. That's pretty funny, right?
It's a rough week that's thankfully coming to an end and there's always the promise of next week getting better. I'm confident that God has given me what I need to get me through whatever trial comes my way but I kinda need a breather first.
Does your faith waiver depending on the circumstances? And if it doesn't, how did you get to that point?
Friday, February 13, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
My marriage
I'm blessed to have been married for over 24 years and although there have been some very unpleasant times in 24 years, there have also been some wonderful times. I often wondered during the rough times why I couldn't discern God's voice about what I should be doing about our state of unhappiness and frustration.
Once I let go and let God, things improved. Not overnight, but eventually. Today my husband still annoys me at times~ like when he washes his car every day getting home from work, or when he is a little too vocal on what he thinks of politicians, celebrities, etc. And then he puts me first by doing some little random thing that will be make my life easier or he'll explain a math problem to me ~ patiently ~ and I know God knew what he was doing 24 years ago.
Once I let go and let God, things improved. Not overnight, but eventually. Today my husband still annoys me at times~ like when he washes his car every day getting home from work, or when he is a little too vocal on what he thinks of politicians, celebrities, etc. And then he puts me first by doing some little random thing that will be make my life easier or he'll explain a math problem to me ~ patiently ~ and I know God knew what he was doing 24 years ago.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
God is good! Part of my recently added responsibilities at work is assisting the Assimilation department. This weekend, we are conducting 4 baptism services. Saturday morning, Saturday evening, and both Sunday morning services.
I've been sick all week. Total Nyquil commercial~ achy, sneezy, fever so you can't sleep stuff. I didn't want to let the Director of Assimilation know that I might not be making it this weekend but then today I started feeling better. Still a little raspy but, overall, 100% better!
Can't wait to see people who are taking the next step~ what a privilege!
"Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age." Matthew 28:19-20 NLV
I've been sick all week. Total Nyquil commercial~ achy, sneezy, fever so you can't sleep stuff. I didn't want to let the Director of Assimilation know that I might not be making it this weekend but then today I started feeling better. Still a little raspy but, overall, 100% better!
Can't wait to see people who are taking the next step~ what a privilege!
"Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age." Matthew 28:19-20 NLV
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
I can paint!
Halfway through week #2 and feeling pretty good about my progress. Still very concerned about time management~ not really my part in making good decisions but, rather, just an overall lack of time in general. Ah, God will make a way.
Yesterday we had a staff meeting at Grace Family Church and we began we praise and worship watching a DVD from Hillsong Church. We have a phenomenal choir and band but even they had to be moved by this group. After going over some staff business, there was a project whereby we had to split up into groups of five each and paint a mosaic type drawing that symbolizes the mission of Grace. I have to tell you ~ creativity is not my forte'. I'm quite sure that I rolled my eyes as we were guided and coaxed to have a good time with this project.
Turns out it was a lot of fun! In fact, I was one of the last people to leave the gymnasium because I kept having ideas we could add to the picture. Who knew?? Oh, and God showed me that I actually can paint a little. With great direction from one of our executive pastors, I made a pretty good ocean wave drawing. Seriously~ even people not in our group could tell what it was. You have no idea the victory in that! My mother and husband, both artistic people, would have been impressed. What talent do you have that God can use? What talent do you have that can be developed?
Yesterday we had a staff meeting at Grace Family Church and we began we praise and worship watching a DVD from Hillsong Church. We have a phenomenal choir and band but even they had to be moved by this group. After going over some staff business, there was a project whereby we had to split up into groups of five each and paint a mosaic type drawing that symbolizes the mission of Grace. I have to tell you ~ creativity is not my forte'. I'm quite sure that I rolled my eyes as we were guided and coaxed to have a good time with this project.
Turns out it was a lot of fun! In fact, I was one of the last people to leave the gymnasium because I kept having ideas we could add to the picture. Who knew?? Oh, and God showed me that I actually can paint a little. With great direction from one of our executive pastors, I made a pretty good ocean wave drawing. Seriously~ even people not in our group could tell what it was. You have no idea the victory in that! My mother and husband, both artistic people, would have been impressed. What talent do you have that God can use? What talent do you have that can be developed?
Friday, January 9, 2009
My husband and I are huge Gator fans. You know~ they just won the BCS National Championship game last night? What a great game.
But more than just being a great team, I am (and thousands of other people are, too) hugely impressed with Tim Tebow, the winning quarterback and Heisman trophy winner. A couple of months ago, I was invited to attend A Womans Place fundraising gala here in Tampa in which Pam Tebow, Tim's mother, was the guest speaker. She and her husband are missionaries and she spoke at length about her experiences as such. She also told many anecdotes about "Timmy"(funny, considering he's now 235 pounds and 21 years old) and his great love for our Lord. This young man is going to succeed in life in a multitude of ways. His work ethic is unsurpassed and his talents are many but it is his declaration of John 3:16 on his face (literally) every game and his gratitude to God verbally whenever he is interviewed; it's his missionary work every summer and his participation with Christian student groups and his mentoring and leadership to his team... he is a man of faith and he is proud to share that.
To be a Gator fan is sweet again this year as we now get to sit back and enjoy that championship win until next season but to have Tim on our side is amazingly sweet!
Now if we can just make sure he returns for his senior year and avoids the NFL draft.....
But more than just being a great team, I am (and thousands of other people are, too) hugely impressed with Tim Tebow, the winning quarterback and Heisman trophy winner. A couple of months ago, I was invited to attend A Womans Place fundraising gala here in Tampa in which Pam Tebow, Tim's mother, was the guest speaker. She and her husband are missionaries and she spoke at length about her experiences as such. She also told many anecdotes about "Timmy"(funny, considering he's now 235 pounds and 21 years old) and his great love for our Lord. This young man is going to succeed in life in a multitude of ways. His work ethic is unsurpassed and his talents are many but it is his declaration of John 3:16 on his face (literally) every game and his gratitude to God verbally whenever he is interviewed; it's his missionary work every summer and his participation with Christian student groups and his mentoring and leadership to his team... he is a man of faith and he is proud to share that.
To be a Gator fan is sweet again this year as we now get to sit back and enjoy that championship win until next season but to have Tim on our side is amazingly sweet!
Now if we can just make sure he returns for his senior year and avoids the NFL draft.....
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
24 hours in a day is not enough sometimes....
It's an interesting thing when you make a decision to begin a new venture in your life. The free time that you had available for the new venture seems to have been a figment of the imagination.
I've been very busy at work. The economy has had its effect on the church (the economy issues have not been discriminatory) and we have had to scale back on staff..some positions eliminated, others reduced to part time. So as life would have it, I have absorbed a couple of positions. Blessed though I am to still be working, my 40 hr week has ballooned to 50 or...55? I don't know~ I'm afraid to look too closely.
The point is that I started college (with my handful of credits from the 1990's in tow) on Monday and I need to find a balance. Naturally, I am doubting what I thought was God prompting me to go to school. Did I really hear Him correctly? How do we KNOW when decisions we've made are not our own musings?
Maybe He's just using that sense of humor that He knows I love! Either way, I know this much ~ until I hear God speak loud and clear that I can't make this all happen, I'm in for the long haul.
I've been very busy at work. The economy has had its effect on the church (the economy issues have not been discriminatory) and we have had to scale back on staff..some positions eliminated, others reduced to part time. So as life would have it, I have absorbed a couple of positions. Blessed though I am to still be working, my 40 hr week has ballooned to 50 or...55? I don't know~ I'm afraid to look too closely.
The point is that I started college (with my handful of credits from the 1990's in tow) on Monday and I need to find a balance. Naturally, I am doubting what I thought was God prompting me to go to school. Did I really hear Him correctly? How do we KNOW when decisions we've made are not our own musings?
Maybe He's just using that sense of humor that He knows I love! Either way, I know this much ~ until I hear God speak loud and clear that I can't make this all happen, I'm in for the long haul.
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
New Beginnings...
My 18 year old freshman son and 22 year old junior daughter laughed at me when I relayed how excited I was to get my books in the mail for spring semester. They said that feeling would pass. Well, they may be right but I'm on the brink of beginning what I've secretly longed for..a college education.
It's daunting to consider that my study habits formed in high school were ~ well, let's agree to call them lackluster. Have I learned a few things about time management, organization and prioritizing since then? Thank God, yes. He is going to help me remain focused and enthusiastic throughout the next four years. We've made a deal, God and I.
Since being blessed enough to land an administrative position in a church 2 years ago, I have witnessed how God works through ALL people. How it was that I ignored Him for most of my life is beyond comprehension but He's been gently nudging me and peaking my curiosity for years in preparation for a future in ministry in some capacity. Not exactly sure what that looks like but I don't even need to. There is a plan...there is always a plan.
It's daunting to consider that my study habits formed in high school were ~ well, let's agree to call them lackluster. Have I learned a few things about time management, organization and prioritizing since then? Thank God, yes. He is going to help me remain focused and enthusiastic throughout the next four years. We've made a deal, God and I.
Since being blessed enough to land an administrative position in a church 2 years ago, I have witnessed how God works through ALL people. How it was that I ignored Him for most of my life is beyond comprehension but He's been gently nudging me and peaking my curiosity for years in preparation for a future in ministry in some capacity. Not exactly sure what that looks like but I don't even need to. There is a plan...there is always a plan.
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